My learnings for a satisfying career and a fulfilling life

Some of my learnings for a satisfying career and a fulfilling life:

·       No matter what, always follow your heart - The more you follow, the stronger your inside mind, which directs you, gets. It starts to give you better and better direction once you start to honor it. Never be afraid to take action based on what your heart says, no matter how late it has become, no matter what people will say. Nobody, I mean nobody, not even your parents or your spouse can think better about you more than what you can do yourself. Rely on yourself, this is the only thing you got, everything else is temporary.
       There is nothing impossible if you trust yourself. You can pretty much do anything which you want to do and are passionate about. Doesn't matter if you made a wrong career choice, change it mid-way. You will feel the heat but you will be happy.

·       Always strive for more than what you are or what you have - This is the only life you have. To live it fully you need to take up bigger responsibilities, which could add bigger value to the world. Trust me , bigger the responsibility, bigger the breathing room it has. Smaller responsibility is like living in a small enclosure, with no room to move around. Strive for bigger roles, if you do not get it, offer your services for free in a bigger responsibility. The idea is to play a bigger game. Bigger and more challenging the game, the more you are going to enjoy it. Value the people who have bigger visions, be around them, as they will pull you up. 

·       Develop relationships with trust - Keep on building new relationships and nourishing old relationships. Be fair and straight to people. Trusted people are a huge support for you to keep standing in any circumstances. At the end of the day, the only thing that will count will be the number of people you have trusted relationship with.
 

·       Develop a similar trusted relationship with yourself - Most of the time, we are afraid of ourselves only, when we are afraid of public speaking, of confronting others, of meeting your friend who has done too well in life. These are all internal fears because we do not trust ourselves. We always doubt ourselves, are we good enough? Do we have the same capabilities as others do? Of course we do, if only we could eliminate internal hesitations. Start building a good relationship with yourself, like it because that's all you got.

 There are a lot of time when I followed these principles and gained tremendously, professionally and personally. There a lot of other times when I did not follow these principles and ended up repenting those decisions.

Balance and Middle Way

Finding the Right Balance

I think it is all about finding the right balance, be it personal life, work life, student life. There are extremes everywhere, but finding the right balance is the key to a well lead life.

Most of the people get caught in the extremes. What is an extreme,  for example if somebody puts all his life, all his time and energy in work, with no social life, no home life, well...I don't know what he/she going to feel at the dawn of his/her life.

Be Professional

Be Professional

There is no friendship in professional life, there could be rapport, there could be reasonable favors, but no friendship. No going extra mile for anybody. Clear the expectations and work as per those. Never ever let any thing slip-by because of friendship, be straight when it comes to deliverable.

How to provide feedback

Appraisal time( might be over for some of us) , some tips on providing feedback:

Feedback should be provided only when somebody seeks it badly. Providing it proactively startles the receiver and turns him or her defensive.

To be effective, feedback should always be constructive feedback, and never as negative feedback. If you just want to indicate a fault in a person, please restrain. Only provide feedback if you have an idea on how something could be unlocked in that person for him or her to realize full his or her full potential.

Even after providing the information on how he or she can improve, you need to work with that person on this improvement so that he or she does not deviate again towards the status quo.

So a good feedback is not just a statement for anybody, it is a responsibility which has to be exercised very diligently.

Negative Marking

Impact of Speaking without Meaning

Sometimes in a meeting, we make a comment just for the sake of it. Might be that we are under pressure to say something for the sake of our position or role. Might be that we think, we will be perceived as a person with nothing to contribute, so we should speak something, should ask some question. Might be that we just want to be in agreement with rest of the group.

But speaking just for the sake of it, without adding value, without being aware of what you are saying and why you are saying, is disastrous. Never ever do it.

Rather be aware of what you are saying, mean it and say it with conviction.

Life's Teachings are the Best

Experiencing Life

This world is like an experience zone. Every experience, good or bad, teaches us a bit more about life, a bit more about this world. It is like a huge jig-saw puzzle, with each experience, the peices get fitted here and there and then we say ahha.... now I understand why it happened so.

Same way our point-of-views keep changing as we understand the laws-of-life better with new experiences. Point-of-view is like a colored filter through which we see the world. The color of this filter keeps changing as we gain new experiences.

Do you ever wonder how you used to look at the world few years ago, and how different it is when you see it now? And it is a continuous process, that is, the way you think about anything right now, might not be the same few years from now. The same world start to look different than it used to be, although nothing really has changed. It is just that your understanding of laws-of-life has become a bit better with new experiences.

The most important skill in professional life

At least my professional experience leads me to the conclusion that Effective Communication is the most important skill in professional life.

What does Effective communication mean? It means:
1. Clear and concise communication
2. Appropriate amount of information as per the audience
3. Display of right amount of emotions in the communication
4. Finally, the ability to convey the core message

It is such a basic skill for a human being and yet is not mastered by many. If you have good communication skills, chances are that you have a lot of other good skills as well. Because good communication comes with the interplay of lot of other things like, vast knowledge, vast experience, emotional stability, sharpness of the mind, presence of mind.

But the reverse is not ture, that is, you might have vast knowledge, vast experience but still might not have good communication skills.

It is highly recommended for parents to train their children in this basic skill to the best of their abilities.

How to get Energized at work?

How to we get energized at work? Well, how do we get energized in a game or whatever else we like to do.May be because it has:

• Our Interest
• Challenge
• Positive Stress
• Support and Cooperation
• Our 100% Participation
• Support and Cooperation
• The Goal
• Fun! 

If we carry the same factors as above to our work, let's see how exciting the work becomes.

Our interest: Like in a football game, you enjoy your position if you are best skilled in that position and reinforce your team from that position. Same way, in an organization, be in a position where you are most skilled at. Having the right people in the right places makes the whole work or business to flow smoothly.   
It is a very trite statement, but we have to have interest in whatever we are doing. Otherwise work becomes a load which we have to carry everyday.

Managers should take into account personal interests of people, as much as possible, while giving ownership of tasks.

Challenge: Do you enjoy playing with a weak opponent or a strong opponent? Probably the latter one. Why? Because the Challenge is more in that case. Challenge gives energy. Raise the bar for whatever you are doing. Stretch yourselves for a few extra miles.Take calculated risks. In your target settings, commit for a little more than what seems feasible and then try your best to achieve it. Managers should appreciate over-commitment and some failures than under-commitment and all successes. 

Positive Stress: Can you remember tense moments in a Game, and then suddenly, with team effort, the Game turns around. The whole experience is thrilling. Same way in workplace, some amount of positive stress is healthy to maintain the excitement. Working under pressure to complete our commitments gives a kind of positive stress, which is healthy for personal growth. Break the boundaries and push ourselves to achieve whatever we targeted for.

Support and Cooperation: Just like in a Game, do whatever you are best at and seek support and cooperation for the rest. Our eyes should be on the bigger Goal, than just our part. Align yourselves with the Goal of organization one level above you. Do whatever it takes to achieve the organization Goal, not just your personal part. In the end, what matters is the win of the whole team, not just your part.

Our 100% Participation: What does 100% mean? Is it just 100% of your physical presence? Or is it 100% presence of your body, mind and spirit? Energy comes when we are 100% present with our Body, Mind and Spirit.Imagine what could happen in a game, if your mind is somewhere else, no matter how fit you physically are, you will not succeed and your team will not succeed. Give your 100% to your work place during the work hours. Get yourself immersed fully.

The Goal: Have you felt the exhilaration when our favorite team in a game does a Goal? When the whole organization is clear about the Goal and synergizes towards it to achieve that Goal, success is inevitable. Clarity of the Goal gives Energy and Clarity of the Strategy gives direction. Combine this with team spirit and you have a winning formula. Everyone in an organization should be clear on what the Goal is. If we are not clear, we should ask your team leader and align yourselves with the organization goal. Make sure you are running in the right direction.

  

Fun! : Above all, a game is fun. Let your work place also be so. Plan and achieve smaller milestones during the course of the project or work you are doing. Celebrate these small milestones with full enthusiasm! Share your achievements (and sweets) with others. You are the one to make your workplace - a fun-place.

Don't let your work be just work, Let it be a Game and let's play it with full heart !

Book Review: Influence by Robert Cialdini

There are certain pre-conceived  notions and beliefs inherent in us. When these ingrained beliefs get influenced by things around us, the stimulus,  trigger automatic action or the mechanical behavior on our part. Marketers use external stimulus to Influence these beliefs for selling of their products.

This book is about these inherent beliefs, how marketers exploit these and how we can be more aware about these to avoid our exploitation. Also how we can use some of these beliefs to influence others in business and at work.

Some of these "Influences" are listed below

If it is Expensive, it Must be Good !!
The inherent belief customers has is that if it is Cheap, it's not good, and in parallel, if it is expensive, it must be good ! We need to price our products and services aptly. Sometimes, pricing too low might have a negative impact on sales - this is reverse to Micro-economics Price-Demand curve

The Contrast Principle  - We see things in contrast, e.g job interviews, or shopping. So it is good offer few inferior things and then even and average quality good will appeal to the customer.

Reciprocity Rule - We are obligated to the future repayment of the favors. Take the favors with a lot of caution. At the same time, try to do favors for others for a bigger payback in future. The lunches to the team never go waste.

But be careful about the reciprocity rule as this could lead to unfair exchanges on our part, we might end up doing much bigger favors in return to trivial favors - We should evaluate the favors objectively.

Reciprocal concessions are another subtle form of reciprocity rule. Make a bigger request, and when the person objects, offer a smaller request. He will be obligated to comply with the smaller request because you have made him a concession - Very strong Negotiation trick.

Limited things have value - do not provide your services, not all of it, free of cost, otherwise it will lose its value.

Commitment and Consistency - This is a killer one !
Compliance to commitment is in basic human psyche. Be consistent with what we have already done. If we have decided something, e.g to Marry somebody , then stick to it and do it, even if internally we know that it is not the right thing to do. We keep on complying to what we have already chosen. Not only complying, we come-up with fair reasons for complying.

It is good to get verbal or better written commitment of your employees, they will be forced to comply due to consistency principle. Written commitments work better because more work go in these. More the effort in the commitment, stronger is the compliance of those commitments. No wonder Indian marriages work much better than the ones in western world.

Do not make commitments with your kids for expensive toys, once you do, you will be obligated to  comply to the commitment.

How to identify that you , yourself are falling into this commitment consistency trap? You stomach will tell you , will have a funny feeling that you do not want it and still going for it.

How to say no in such circumstances ? - Tell them exactly what is happening in the consistency trap. Say that you will not take it just because you made a commitment. Hence, very sorry but I will not be able to comply.

Social Proof - you do how others do.
The reverse of this is that nobody does anything, because there are a lot of people responsible, and everybody thinks that someone will do it, and nobody ends up doing it.  It is very important to have a clear responsibility in an organization.

In the times of uncertainty, we look around what others are doing, and tend to do the same. So even in an organization scenario, during uncertain circumstances like lay offs, M&A, keep the communication going with your employees. Do not let the uncertainty prevail.

In a personal emergency, explain your situation to others well, so that they will be able to help you.

How to say No ? -  Be aware of the fact when there is a social compliance happening with wrong data or for a wrong cause, and come under your control and decide to act on your own.

Liking - Tendency to say yes to some one we know and like
The Tupperware party - A known group of friends and neighbors get together, then the host offers them to buy the Tupperware bottles etc, and most of these friends and neighbors comply, just because they cannot say no.

The Halo Effect - Physical attractiveness - very difficult to say no to attractive people.We assign favorable traits automatically to good looking people.

We like people who are similar to us, in terms of dressing up, hobbies, work outs,  etc

We like people who compliment us or laugh at our jokes :)

Positive and negative association - Advertisers use the principle of association a lot. They associate with their product a representative person, a sports celebrity or a film start, who is representative of the Target customers. Similarly, in workplace environment, who you associate yourself with, impacts your career. So chose your company very carefully.

How to say no under the linking influence? - The Key say no here is to be aware and to reflect back that our decision is coming because our liking for the person or because of the objective factors.

Authority - Deep seated sense of duty to Authority, we tend to comply to our bosses, no matter what. We comply to doctors and other experts in their fields.

Titles also impact the way people behave with you.

Clothes, they way you dress up, can also trigger Authority

The key to tackle this bias is to be aware when to follow the Authority and when to resist it. Should be mindful about the right kind of Authority

Scarcity - The rule of the few
The opportunity seems more valuable to us when its availability is limited. Limited edition products use the same principle. People seem to be more motivated by the thought of losing something than at the thought of gaining something.

Notion that things that are difficult to possess are better than the ones which could be easily obtained.

Availability is freedom and we hate to lose freedom

This principle is heavily used in marketing, limited seats availability in hotels etc. Corner plots of a layout, Top most floors of the tower.

Scarcity causes desperation , and people are ready to pay any price to over come their desperation.

Information scarcity or Censored information is desired more than the information which is readily available.

Rare chocolate and cookies taste better, though the taste might be the same as that of an ordinary chocolate or a cookie.

Parents who enforce discipline with their children inconsistently , make the children rebellious. Stick to the restrictions imposed, no matter what.

How to say No to Scarcity influences?  Recognize the arousal that happens when we face scarcity. Use that arousal to objectively analyze whether there is genuine scarcity or a created one. Ask yourself, do I really need this thing or do I just want to possess it.

The complex world
Although human beings have a much evolved brain, they have made it less powerful by making the world around them more complex.In this complex world, it is really important to be aware as much as possible, to make any sense of this crazy world.

How to Motivate People?

I learnt this from a RSA video I saw on you tube. Although I had a vague Idea about this topic, but this video organized the concept very nicely.

How to motivate people and keep them motivated? Traditional view is, more the incentives, better the people will perform. This worked for purely mechanical tasks, but it will not work for the knowledge workers which we have.Ofcourse people should get enough money as per their skill set. Beyond that, if you want better performance, and try the traditional way of showing a "carrot" and getting better performance and motivated employees, then you are hugely mistaken.

Research shows that what works as motivation tool is the AMP rule, i.e Autonomy, Mastery and Purpose.

Autonomy means give enough freedom to our people, to let them do things in their own way. Give them ownership of a chunk of work, and then get out of the way. Let them be their own managers.

Mastery means that people are motivated to do something if by doing that they get better and better at it. They become Masters of that professional expertise. People contribute freely to Open Source code because by doing that they add to their technical skills as well as they have a feeling of making a valuable contribution.

Purpose means a sense of direction, a sense of focus. People should know what they are working towards, how they are making world a better place.Sense of purpose should make them get up in morning and rush to work enthusiastically.

Very simple concepts but very powerfull...

Listening to yourself and taking quick action as per that

To listen to yourself, you have to develop a good relationship with yourself. Never scold yourself. If you make a mistake, instead of blaming yourself, analyze it, consult it with yourself, agree with yourself on how to proceed. 

Your inner self usually tells you what to do, but often time we ignore him or are too shy to act as per the advice of our inner self. I feel this is one of the differences between successful and unsuccessful people.

Successful people listen to themselves and act promptly as per that vs the other one’s either don’t listen or don’t act as per that or both.

Make a habit of listening to yourself and immediately acting as per that. Try from today. If your inner voice tells you to talk to somebody, go ahead and do it. Practice following your inner voice little by little. Show your inner-self that you respect him and follow him. Make him(yourself) your best friend.

Organization Design

If you are an independent BU owner and have the responsibility to design your own organization, you should list down what is important, what is critical, what is it that you must deliver as a BU owner? Keep only those top level responsibilities with yourself and delegate all others. This is how you should design your organization.

Otherwise, if you yourself take less or more responsiblity, you will either don't know what is happening in your BU (in case you take less responsibility) or will be so overloaded(in case you take more responsibility) that you will not know what is happening outside of your organization.

Do not make experimental drastic changes in your organization

Do not make drastic changes to Organization design of your BU. Make changes slowly, watch it how it goes and then make any further changes. Big drastic changes can bite you. Running businesses do not have room for failures, even if you are experimenting for organizations betterment, if you fail, you are out. This is not a college experiment, this is real business. So be conservative in making changes, make sure you know what you are doing. Bite only as much as you can chew.

Don’t make anybody defensive, specially your colleagues

People try to hit only those who they think as dangerous for themselves. Same is true everywhere else. We tend to push away or hit or kill anything which seems life threatening to us. In professional environment, never make anybody defensive i.e never make them feel that you are putting their job in danger or you are taking away their job. Moment they have slightest hint of any such act, they will turn defensive. In normal circumstances this is ok, things move on. Problem comes when the conditions are difficult, opportunities get scarce and there is a race for getting good work. In these conditions if you are a trusted partner, you will survive; otherwise it will be very difficult.

Don’t play smart

Be simple with people, don’t play smart. If you are smart, be that way. Don’t be fake and then try to be smart. If somebody asks you a question, do not answer as if the other person is stupid. Be sensitive to that and answer sensibly. They might be coming from a background which you don’t know about.